Self-Reflection on My Relationship Skills
Language is very vital in communication as it can express body and emotions. I have acquired some social skills that I am implementing right now in my relationships at home, school, in the work place and generally in my social environment. I was always very defensive in my interactions with others and ready to attack, but I am changing it to become more supportive where I want to find the root cause of the problem or identify the issue. First, I was very evaluative of another person’s action. There was this day I went to the supermarket and there was a very long queue we had to make to get to the cashier. I asked her to be coming in thirty minutes earlier than the rest of the workers or risk being terminated after several warnings.
She quit a few days later claiming that she could not work under my supervision. That was a few months ago, today, I have another staff member with similar characteristics to that of Daria and I have learnt new strategies of dealing with her while at work without making her feel I am trying to control her. I called her and sat her down calmly where I explained to her that coming in late, being that she operates in the kitchen, brings about delays in the entire food preparation process because food does not get ready in time and we cannot satisfy customer orders and deliveries. “If you can come in at the right time, we will improve on service delivery and work on ensuring adequate customer satisfaction.
I would give him rides home and buy him lunch in order to win him. I was expecting to woe him into granting me favors. One day I asked him to make me a member of the book club but he was hesitant because they had rules which he clearly laid out to me but I was so angry and pointed it out to him that I had done so much for him and yet he could not deliver the only thing I wanted from him. My statement offended him because he realized I was putting up an act only to get membership into the book club, which was manipulative. From the communication course, I learnt to be a better requester and I now know that honesty is a virtue of great importance.
The best thing to do in that case would have been to listen to her argument until the end to show that I valued her opinion and maybe even contributed to her argument supportively. I have realized that treating people as you would like them to treat you is equally important. I love it when I am treated with respect by other people and considered important. Therefore, reciprocating this to the social circle helps create meaningful relationships which are more satisfying and filled with trust. At work, I supervise a few staff members and today, I treat them as my equals. We always put on casually and ate our meals in the dining area and that was final. We had a fall out.
Another instance was in a book club I went to after school. We were discussing the book “Interlopers” and every one was asked to come up with an idea of who the intruder was in the book. I found the men to be the intruders whereas some people said the wolves were the intruders (Mohammed and Adnan). ” Moreover I was so worried about hurting another person’s feelings as we interacted that often the message did not come out clearly. On the day of our family reunion dinner, a friend of mine heard about it and wanted to come join us, I told her she could come but she was not going to like it. From this response, I did not wat her to come because I was worried she was not going to have fun there.
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